“ADHD is just an overdiagnosed excuse for laziness”.
I heard this from a parent of one of my clients this week, but the reality couldn’t be more different. Despite growing awareness, ADHD remains widely misunderstood. Some dismiss it as an excuse for a lack of effort, while others say, “Everyone has a little ADHD.” But ADHD isn’t just occasional forgetfulness or distraction—it’s a persistent challenge affecting work, relationships, and self-esteem. And for me, it’s personal.
ADHD is more than a buzzword—it’s a lived experience filled with challenges, frustrations, and unexpected strengths. While many assume it’s just about struggling to focus or being overly energetic, ADHD is far more complex, affecting emotional regulation, executive function, and daily life in profound ways. In reality, it’s more about having too much attention than not enough!
My ADHD – I felt dumb!
As both a psychologist and someone with ADHD, I’ve spent years not only working with this neurotype but also living it. As a child, I was a “swivel head,” constantly distracted, daydreaming, and noticing everything around me. Socially, I was blunt in my delivery, struggled to maintain friendships, and was super clumsy. I felt dumb at school. Although I knew I had strengths, I rarely managed to show them in a classroom setting—except in drama or art. I was uncoordinated and had poor executive function skills, so strategising or planning on the run was impossible. Team sports were overwhelming—everything moved too fast.
My school reports always echoed the same sentiment: “If Lydia could stop talking and pay attention, she has a lot of potential.” This recurring feedback reinforced my frustration—I was capable but unable to meet expectations in traditional learning environments.
How I got through
At 13, I discovered the sport of rowing, and I was good at it. It required minimal coordination, and being outside, going fast, and winning races suited me—until performance anxiety kicked in (but that’s another story).
Growing up, sports became my coping mechanism. The structure, routine, and competition provided the dopamine I needed to focus. I genuinely believe I only survived post-graduate studies because I was on a rowing scholarship in America. The structured environment kept me on track, and the drive for continuous improvement helped me push through academic demands. Without that structure, I don’t know how I would have coped. Although this was a time that I coped relatively well, leaving the nest can be a very difficult time for many with ADHD as they lose their support structure for the first time.
I must have learned to mask my symptoms off the water without realising it. Over time, I adapted, and as I grew older, I found ways to balance my personal and professional life.
As a psychologist, my work is rewarding—it’s an excellent dopamine fix—but it’s also mentally exhausting. By the end of the day, my social battery is drained, and I often retreat to recharge. Exercise helps, but like many with ADHD, I struggle with the all-or-nothing mindset—pushing too hard, getting injured, and then losing consistency. Learning to pace myself is a work in progress.
A Taste of my ADHD today: a few moments in my head
Your mind races with endless thoughts. Did I eat enough this morning? I wonder what my parents are doing. Oh, look, my toes need painting. Wait, what am I wearing to dinner? I hope I don’t say anything stupid. And these are just the thoughts you notice—others fly through your brain, distracting you before vanishing… hopefully, they weren’t too important.
You reach for your phone but realise your coffee is missing. You go to find it but get distracted by a pile of laundry. Wait, do the kids have anything on this weekend? Back to the coffee—no luck. You head to the bathroom, but your shirt suddenly feels unbearable. Too itchy. I have to change. No, wait, there’s no time. But I can’t stand this texture. I have to change it.
Next, you search for your coffee again and stumble upon the shed keys you lost weeks ago. I should go out there now. But no, there’s no time. By the time you return to the kitchen, you spot your now-cold coffee and think, Maybe I should start painting again? The thought disappears as quickly as it arrived. The day has barely begun, and you’re already mentally exhausted.
For those without ADHD, daily routines may feel straightforward. For those with ADHD, every task requires significant mental effort. The constant stream of distractions and intrusive thoughts can make even simple things—like remembering where your keys are—feel overwhelming.
What is ADHD?
ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) is a misleading name. It’s not a deficit of attention—it’s an abundance of attention that’s difficult to regulate. Not everyone with ADHD is hyperactive; many, especially women and those with the inattentive type, go undiagnosed for years because their symptoms don’t fit the stereotype.
ADHD is typically categorised into three types:
- Predominantly Inattentive Type: Difficulty focusing, forgetfulness, and struggles with organisation.
- Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive Type: Restlessness, fidgeting, and impulsive decision-making.
- Combined Type: A mix of inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive traits.
The Strengths of ADHD
While ADHD presents challenges, it also comes with unique strengths:
- Creativity – Many people with ADHD excel in creative fields, from writing to music to entrepreneurship.
- Hyperfocus – When engaged in something they love, individuals with ADHD can immerse themselves deeply and produce incredible results.
- Resilience – Facing numerous challenges builds perseverance and a strong sense of empathy.
- Innovation – ADHD minds think outside the box, often driving change and creativity.
- Empathy – People with ADHD tend to be deeply attuned to others’ emotions, forming strong connections and offering meaningful support.
- Driving Progress – Many of history’s most influential thinkers, inventors, and leaders displayed characteristics of ADHD. From elite athletes to entrepreneurs and artists, ADHD’ers often push boundaries, bringing fresh perspectives and disruptive ideas that move society forward in unexpected and fascinating ways. Their ability to embrace risk, pursue passion projects with intensity, and think unconventionally makes them natural trailblazers in industries that thrive on innovation and creativity.
Seeking Diagnosis and Treatment
For those who suspect they have ADHD, seeking a diagnosis can be life-changing. A psychiatrist or psychologist can assess symptoms and recommend treatment options, which may include medication, therapy, and behavioural strategies.
Stimulant medications like Ritalin or Dexamphetamine are among the most researched and widely prescribed treatments for ADHD. Numerous studies confirm their safety and efficacy when used appropriately. According to the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), stimulant medications like methylphenidate and amphetamines have been used for decades with well-documented benefits in treating ADHD.
As a psychologist, I believe that, unlike many other conditions, it is almost unethical not to suggest trialling stimulant medication for ADHD due to the vast, positive differences it can make in someone’s life. Stimulants can help regulate focus and emotions, while therapy provides tools for managing daily challenges. The ability to regulate focus, control impulses, and improve executive function can be truly transformative.
Final Thoughts
ADHD can feel like a rollercoaster—chaotic but also filled with creativity, passion, and unexpected brilliance. Sure, you might lose your keys three times a day or hyperfocus on researching the history of escalators instead of answering emails. Still, you also bring energy, innovation, and resilience to the table.
Living with ADHD isn’t just about struggles—it’s about learning to navigate a world that isn’t built for neurodivergent brains, often with a good dose of humour. With the right support, understanding, and tools, individuals with ADHD can harness their strengths and thrive. And hey, if nothing else, life is never boring.
For those with ADHD, the message needs to be clear
You are not alone, and you are not broken. Your mind is wired differently, and that’s not a flaw—it’s a unique strength. The world needs your creativity, your innovation, and your perspective.